sigh.

So I have no friends on here so there's no better place to vent.
Today was not a good day.
Except I've been talking to this guy who I really really like, made it easier because he makes me smile. He is the only thing that's getting me through shit right now.
Mentally though its not been a good one. Anyone who'll eventually read this and suffers from bi-polar depression can understand.
I honestly could not stop crying, and I am really not a crying type of guy at all. What makes it the worst is it can come on from nowhere. Ill be happy go lucky and then bam overwhelming sadness and tears for what is sometimes days. I was diagnosed years ago. Went through a phase where I didn't want to be "crazy" so I stopped taking my medications, then right after I lost insurance so I had to deal. Its never been so bad though. I cant keep an even mood, ill snap and become so angry for no reason that I cant see straight. I mean that literally, not figuratively. Then you know ten minutes later ill feel fine, or ill be overly happy and excited. It is the most terrible thing. It has cost me friendships, and even most recently my job.
Since, I have gotten insurance back, and am working towards becoming healthy and stable again, but until then its just hell.