To him

Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if the guilt ate you alive until you threw up, like I did when I told you I liked you. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if you threw up some more, like I did when you said you liked me. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if the guilt gnawed at you so that you only got 2 hours of sleep at night, like i did the night i finally admitted to liking you. Perhaps less, because I only got that sleep due to the delay. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if you talked to your friends about everything that happened and everything you did to me in detail, like I did with all my favorite things about you. Maybe "sorry" will be a nice thing to hear, when your head aches and your legs shake like mine did before I saw you. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if you wondered how you were going to survive at wow again, like I am now. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if you weren't only saying it to sound like the good person you're wishing to be. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if you have nightmares about me, like I did you when you started getting distant. Maybe 'sorry' would be nice to hear if you begin to question what is wrong with you, like I am to myself right now. Maybe "sorry" would be nice to hear if you kept replaying that kiss in your head, begging God to erase the memories like I am now. Maybe 'sorry' would be nice to hear if you knew half of what you were apologizing for. Maybe 'sorry' would be a nice thing to hear if you actually meant what you said. Oh, but of course you mean it right?? How absurd of me not to believe you. Kind of like how you meant that you needed me? Kind of like how you meant that you "liked me too much"? Kind of like how you meant that you would "never lie to someone as lovely as" me? Kind of like how you meant you "found me irresistible"? Kind of like how you meant you "had a giant mutual crush" on me? But its not fair of me to say that, because you thought you were telling the truth right?? Well thats nice, I guess ill have to say you're right and digress, but what do I do when the day comes around, and you tell me you only "thought" you were sorry? I think you need to grow up.